Can I honestly say #NewYearNewMe right now? I am ready for the new year to start.
The last 6 years have been not the way that I wanted as I moved to a rural part of Idaho to deal with some MIL issues. I really tried to make the best of it, but I struggled with it in every aspect in my life. No running, no blogging, heaving drinking and a whole lot of depression. I have made some vague hints about my feelings and never really went into detail…
Story Time because I missed being 100% honest with all of you. This is a very condensed version of the last few years. There were other items that if you want to know about, I will gladly share since they are not something a mother should do to her only child, but these were the items of most concern and stress.
I have been in a relationship with my significant other since 2004 excluding an almost 6 year break from 2007-2013. We still spoke regularly during our break apart. We had found out with there was some issues with theft and fraud against him. We guessed his mother had something to do with this but we did not know the extent until we moved in with her.
So we moved in with her after her husband, my significant others father passed away. This was only to find out what was going on behind his back for the last 20 years.
The home she is living in was purchased by her father to be used as the family home as she was having difficulties paying bills and her home was in foreclosure. In was purchased in cash in full. She did put a mortgage on the home and she struggled with paying the monthly payment since it was placed on the house. It did not get paid off until my significant others father had passed away.
There was a break-in in the house and ONLY HIS ITEMS were stolen. This was a year after the mortgage was taken out on the home. His mother told him that it was an ex-girlfriend. Living with her, we found paperwork where there was very clear photos of each of the items and very clear descriptions and price values. Where these items were placed, they were not easy to get to as they were heavy, hidden and there were other things that this “ex-girlfriend” would have wanted in the home. Plus the mother had very expensive computer equipment which would have been more of a common theft item that would have been easier to pawn instead of rare antiques. Reading through the police report and the insurance paperwork, we have concluded that this was a case of fraud. She received almost $7000 from the insurance company and she was able to resale the items that were “stolen.”
My other half had a letter in the mail stating that he had a case against him for non-payment of a Discover credit card. He had never signed up for a Discover credit card. Ever. I ran his credit report and he called Discover. They were not able to verify his information. WTF?! He can’t verify himself? On his credit report, there were other credit cards for Brylane Home and Dr. Leonards. What the hell was those for?
Oh. When we moved in I usually got the mail. There was junk mail catalogs for Dr. Leonords and Brylane Home. Flipping through them, these were the companies where the mother purchased things from. She would get her compression socks from Dr. Leonard and bought plastic trees and rugs for the whole home from Brylane Home.
My other half, his name is Kacey. His mother is Kelly Callen. She says sometimes people refer her to K.C. The credit cards in question were placed under “K.C.” She happened to make him an owner of her at home company. Convenient, huh. So my other half now has a credit score of a 4. A FOUR! All because his mother placed credit cards in his name. Will he restore his credit? Yes, but it will take time and money. Identity fraud doesn’t happen from strangers going through your trash or hackers who get your passwords on sketchy websites. I only have known it to happen through family.
My other half was one of the first people to sign up and use eBay. He went to college with the guy that started eBay. I started eBay in 1999, and he started in 1995ish. A lot of other antiques and items for us to resale on eBay were missing. I took a look at the mothers accounts and on the feedback, it shown a good chunk of missing antiques and collectables. Almost $10,000 worth of sales of HIS items. These were things that were to be resold by us, or to not be sold at all. The items he asked his parents about were some WWII Japanese Swords. The reply was “I don’t know. Ghosties. Mexicans.” Serious. He got all three answers asking about the missing items. I printed off the eBay list of the missing items and kept that in the a safe area in a safe place. We asked about it and she just stared and scowled. The we asked again. Stared and scowls. Then no speaking to us at all. Well, she had been caught by us over and over and refused to own up to it. We said Stop. This is enough. Then she decided to cut all ties. We moved back to Boise (YAY!). Sadly, the only living family member that my other half has is such a horrible person. I mean, who can rip their own child off to this extent and decide to never speak to them again. The items sold were not things that can be replaced. Its not like these were cheap Wal-Mart, easily replaceable items. These were rare and one of a kind antiques that took a long time to find and had great value, not just sentimenta to my other half. Its painful to know that he will never find a replacement for most of these treasured items and that she lied about selling them because of her greed and mismanagement of money.
Dealing with his mother was like dealing with a 3 year old having a non-stop temper tantrum for the last six years. There was a lot of whining and backstabbing. Sure, she is fine to your face, but as soon as you leave, the hate really comes out. Stuff that you do not see unless you are living with someone. I have come to conclusion that she is a psychopath and I am not saying that to be dramatic. She really does have an antisocial personality disorder. No one is excluded from the manipulation and the secrets. Her friends are not immune. They just don’t have to see it in front of them on a daily basis like her son and I got to witness the last 6 years.
All the good to come out of this is that I am back to Boise. I have less stress already and I am looking forward to getting back to my happiness that I had before the move 6 years ago. I have some things in the works and trying to recover and get back into a new routine. Part of that is dusting off the blogging that I have missed so much!